The secular world has a lot to say about sex.
And sadly, most people get their ideas about sexuality from society rather than from God, leading to all sorts of pain and confusion.
However, one woman is on a mission to make sure that our culture doesn’t have the last word.
She is determined to restore God’s design for sexuality and is inspiring believers across the nation to join her fight.
Let’s talk about sex.
But first – what emotions, thoughts, or bodily sensations did that word bring up for you?
Perhaps it elicited feelings of ickiness, shame, or general discomfort?
For too long, silence in the church about sexuality has led to guilt, shame, confusion, and in some cases, has resulted in believers separating their sexuality from their spirituality.
Separating one’s sex life from one’s spiritual life manifests in two ways:
First, people believe that God has nothing to say about their sexuality, and therefore, anything goes; or people believe that God thinks their sexuality is “bad,” and therefore, can never be free from shame or enjoy God’s purposes for sex.
But God created our sexual organs and desires and calls them good!
So, why do we suppress, avoid, and hide them as though they are bad or not of God?
Clinical psychologist and Christian Juli Slattery discusses in her book, Rethinking Sexuality, the causes and effects of Christians’ confusion around sex, as well as God’s design for our sexuality.
For example, she explains why suppressing sexual desires only leads to sin and shame.
So, what’s the alternative – satisfying your sexual urges with sexual activity?
Sexual desire is a manifestation of a deeper desire that only God can fully satisfy.
As believers, we should lean into our sexual desires, bring them before the Lord, and seek the deeper needs of our hearts that these desires are trying to communicate.
Then, let God satisfy your deepest desires.
Only when we learn this can we truly be free from sexual sin and shame and live with a healthy and true perspective on sexuality.
Slattery also discusses how having a false view of sexuality harms our sexual intimacy within marriage.
She’s worked with various married individuals who were not experiencing joy in sex with their spouses. While sometimes this is the result of past sexual trauma, it’s typically been a response to years and years of believing sex is “bad” during their single years.
Confusion about sex is destroying intimacy. However, God is able to redeem all things.
Through her book Rethinking Sexuality, podcast Java with Juli, and resources provided on her website, Dr. Slattery is providing avenues for healing and initiating God’s restoration in human sexuality.
Your sexuality does not define you, but it is a part of you created intentionally by God.
Our sexual desires mimic God’s desire for us; our devastation over sexual betrayal mirrors his devastation over our sin; and our sexual intimacy within marriage illustrates the safety, vulnerability, tenderness, and fulfillment of intimacy with our Creator.
Oh, does God long for intimacy with you. He wants all of you. Let Him, not the world, claim your sexuality.
In what ways have you been sexually discipled by the world?
What would it look like for you to submit – or begin to learn to submit – your sexuality to God instead of suppressing or avoiding it?
The Lord deeply loves his children. He intentionally designed each one of us, and desires to be intimately involved in every part of our hearts and our lives.
Yes, that includes your sexuality. And that’s nothing to be ashamed about.